theonion

INDIANAPOLISProfusely apologizing for the unexpected and last-minute cancellation, singer-songwriter Phoebe Bridgers announced Monday that she was postponing her show at Gainbridge Fieldhouse after experiencing a twinge of happiness. I hate to do this, but fans wouldnt be able to experience The Lost Tour as intended if I performed in the state I am tonight, said [] The post Phoebe Bridgers Postpones Concert After Experiencing Twinge Of Happiness appeared first on The Onion .

BALTIMOREIn a major breakthrough that sheds new light on the still largely unexplored region, leading fertility experts at the Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine announced Friday that they had discovered rare deep-ball sperm at the bottom of the testes. Images shared by the researchers revealed a vast menagerie of strange and otherworldly sperm that [] The post Fertility Experts Discover Rare Deep-Ball Sperm At Bottom Of Testes appeared first on The Onion .